Practice Column

We've been writing a lot in class lately, which I've really enjoyed. I like getting practice in class and receiving immediate feedback from my teachers and peers.

Below is a column that I started in class on Friday and finished over the weekend:

Apology could have lessened the pain

William Adkins wasn’t upset that a woman who killed his 16-year-old son only received six to eight months of jail time.
He was upset that she didn’t offer an apology to him or his family.
The woman, Judy Earlene Stilwell, 60, pleaded guilty to passing a stopped school bus and striking his son, Nicholas. She received 36 months of probation and a one year suspension of her driver’s license along with jail time. She was a first time offender.
But she left the courtroom without offering any condolences to the Adkins family.
“She never even looked in our direction,” he said in an interview with the Greensboro News & Record.
Nicholas was days away from becoming a junior at McMichael High School when he died in January. He loved photography, and he had enrolled in a journalism class last semester. He covered his room with information on the solar system and was already making plans for college.
His parents called him their “buddy” and “angel.” They documented his progress in school on a calendar on the refrigerator where they wrote, “We are very proud of you, Nick!” when he was promoted to 11th grade. They loved him.
But living without him is almost unbearable for Adkins and his wife, Lynn.
“I don’t know if I’m coping very well,’’ he said in the interview. “It’s too raw, too fresh. It feels like it happened a few days ago. But it’s almost April. And it’s still hard to believe.’’
Maybe the immense pain that they felt could have been lessened, the edges softened just a little, if Stilwell had bothered to look across the courtroom and mouth the words, “I’m sorry,” to the Adkins family.
In fact, a simply apology can relieve years of pent up anger and resentment when offered to someone who has been hurt, according to Psychology Today Magazine. It can greatly improve the healthy of the one who has been hurt by ridding them of great emotional pain and distress.
That would be helpful for Nicholas’ parents right now. It might not bring their son back, but it would be something.
It would also be helpful for Stilwell.
That’s because an apology not only benefits the person receiving it, but it greatly benefits the one who is offering it. By saying, “I’m sorry,” the person acknowledges that they’ve done something wrong, whether intentional or not, to hurt another. Once they have recognized they’re actions as a mistake and wish to correct them, only then can they move on with their life.
The police report lists no reason for Stilwell to pass the school bus that Nicholas was trying to board at 45 MPH - the speed limit on that road. Maybe she didn’t see the flashing lights and the extended stop sign of the bus. Maybe she was in a hurry and thought she could make it past without hurting anyone.
But she didn’t. Now healing can only begin for Stilwell and the Adkins family once she says two simple words: “I’m sorry.”